I was contemplating delaying this post for another 15 mins or so, just so I could continue with my unlovely ritual of not sleeping and posting my experience therein at the same time every night. It’s interesting to me that I cannot form a consistent sleep schedule but I am having an easy enough time keeping up with posts around the same time every night…erm, morning.
There is one difference however and that is that I am not in my room typing away tonight, or this morning if you prefer, I’m in Jessie’s computer room typing away. She’s sound asleep and here I sit, as I usually do, on her computer furthering my geeky behavior. There are many things that I like about being here at night while she’s sleeping, the overall situation is very…therapeutic in a way. As such, I can attribute a late night such as this to writing my last story: Strings
Go ahead and clicky the linky if interested in a medium-length read about the purpose of human life in the seemingly meaningless structure of existence from a predominately social perspective. This story is partially based upon the idea of Existentialism, something that, while working out the plot, I had little to no idea that such a belief or term existed. I wrote what I felt and it just so happened that there are others who’ve felt the same way and have gone to great lengths to share their thoughts and ideas about the human experience. An unconsciously-shared experience at times, if you’ll allow me such a statement.
The overall belief at the foundation of Existentialism is: while there is no inherent purpose to life that we can perceive or fathom, we are responsible for creating our own meaning and perceiving our own role within the boundaries we define and shape our lives within.
In case you didn’t click the link, here’s the textbook definition:
“…individuals create the meaning and essence of their lives, as opposed to it being created for them by deities or authorities or defined for them by philosophical or theological doctrines.”
Essentially, “Existence precedes essence.”
It can then be stated that one is not born a man but becomes a man due to his life experiences and his inward reactions to those given enlightenments of perception. There is no preset to the human product, no deity has chosen your traits for you and placed you within the world as far as you can observe, so everything a man becomes he becomes due to his own will to survive and because of his desire to become something he considers worthy of survival.
Jean-Paul Sartre, the former leading existentialist philosopher, states:
“Man is defined only in so far as he acts and he is responsible for his actions. To clarify, it can be said that a man who acts cruelly towards other people is, by that act, defined as a cruel man and in that same instance, he (as opposed to his genes, for instance) is defined as being responsible for being this cruel man. Of course, the more positive therapeutic aspect of this is also implied: You can choose to act in a different way, and to be a good person instead of a cruel person. Here it is also clear that since man can choose to be either cruel or good, he is, in fact, neither of these things essentially.”
So in other words, man has the capacity for both good and evil, pious and impious, therein it is impossible to form a constricting term that will fit him neatly into a classification of only good or only bad. He is neither inherently good nor inherently bad, he simply has the ability, the opportunity, to represent both traits in countless ways during his lifetime. He exists, and that is but the first step in being human; all else results from his intellectual standard and his proceeding actions.
Many early philosophers combatted the idea of “existence before essence”, they believed that every human is born with traits that are inert, that are designed to encompass our emotional reactions when the time is right for our minds to do so. Another related philosophical classification is know as Rationalism. Socrates played a major role in the development of this belief, although his most prized student, Plato, eventually formed further beliefs in different studies. And, subsequently, Aristotle, the cherished student of Plato, had little to do with Rationalism as he found the ideas of Empiricism to be more alluring; the idea that all evidence is discovered through experimentation and observation, a strict, scientifically formatted Philosophy.
Existentialism is often considered to be the bleakest and most despairing philosophical movement due to its rather pessimistic nature and its ways of looking at the world from a “realistic” point of view. We all know life isn’t perfect, but most would have you never think such a thought in fear of causing harm to your mental faculties and your views of life in general. Many people fear thinking this way due to it causing what has come to be known as “Existential Depression.” Essentially, Existential Depression is formed due to anxiety melding with incessant intellectual stimulation in regards to the attempt of fathoming human existence and the possibility of an after-life. Many people facing this dilemma would sooner end their own lives than endure a life of intensely draining questioning. An example would be a young man pondering the idea of eternity. He would first be filled with wonder, and then with insight, then with dread. His level of assurance in human life would undoubtedly lower due to him focusing entirely on something that is completely unknowable. Our minds weren’t built to reflect upon things that have never happened, and as such we lack the cognitive ability to look forward into something we’ve never evolved to comprehend.
Existential Angst/Existential Depression:
“Terms used by existentialists, first attributed to Danish philosopher Søren Kierkegaard (1813–1855). In The Concept of Dread (also known as “The Concept of Anxiety”, depending on the translation), Kierkegaard used the word Angest (Danish, meaning “dread”) to describe a profound and deep-seated spiritual condition of insecurity and despair in the free human being. Where the animal is a slave to its instincts but always confident in its own actions, Kierkegaard believed that the freedom given to people leaves the human in a constant fear of failing its responsibilities to God. Kierkegaard’s concept of angst is considered to be an important stepping stone for 20th-century existentialism. While Kierkegaard’s feeling of angst is fear of actual responsibility to God, in modern use, angst was broadened by the later existentialists to include general frustration associated with the conflict between actual responsibilities to self, one’s principles, and others (possibly including God).
To ponder the idea of God beyond the point that organized religion insists that we should is likely to result in some feelings of existential dread, if one is intellectually inclined. To the existential freethinking mind the future appears bleak, icy, reasonless; and as such we are to create our meanings to offset our negative emotions and desperation. The same idea applies to Atheism; If one believes that there is nothing after death then why not commit suicide? Some would say they are just here to enjoy the ride, others may offer a deep, justifiable reason. The same is true with Existentialism; the future is only meaningless if we fail to attach meaning to it.
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When I started this entry at 1:45 am, it now being 2:45 am, I had little to write about. Or maybe I should say, “I thought I had little to write about.” My eyesight is too blurry to proof-read and make corrections, that will have to wait until tomorrow. So, if you read something that fails to make sense, the likely culprit is sleep deprivation.
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EDIT: 6pm – I would like to add that my inability to sleep and this website’s spell-check system is a horrible match. After re-reading this selection today I found spelling errors that a two-year old would pick up on. Now, the only question I have is this: Am I at a lower intelligence level than a two year old or does my lack of sleep impair my ability to write to such a degree that it is almost embarrassing?
